2 Things My Mother-in-Law Taught Me about Business

The caterers, band and florists were busy making our wedding reception perfect.  My new mother-in-law (by the way, I call her mom) was orchestrating it masterfully.  My wife and I had been married just a few hours earlier and the reception time was now at hand.  The band was playing in the background, our friends and family were streaming in to greet us.  Some were using the newly constructed dance floor to remember times past.  I even recall looking on the dance floor and seeing my parents floating around in each others arms.  I am the youngest of nine children so it was quite a pleasure to see, what appeared to be, my parents; young and restless and from yesteryear…

As you can imagine the night was memorable and perfect for my new bride and I.  We still, on occasion, pop in our wedding video and recall the joy and wonder of that day those many years ago.  It’s a day that we will always look back on with fondness. 

Fast forward to this past Easter weekend.  My wife and I invited several families to come to our home for a fun Easter celebration.  We planned, purchased food, prepared eggs for coloring, and had TONS of candy.  We set out tables and games for the kids to play and put the dog in the kennel (he likes to steal food from kids).  We cleaned the house and mowed the lawn.  I even caught my wife spraying down the backyard concrete to ensure it was clean as well.  In short, it was a lot of work.  Everyone seemed to have a great time.  When everyone had gone, we looked around to discover a few things (maybe a little sarcasm) to clean up … again.

Our little Easter party was just a small example of the herculean effort required to put on our wedding reception.  Our reception took months to plan and coordinate, of which every little detail was managed by Mom.  She wasn't micro-managing, but rather she was coordinating and creating a tapestry that my wife and I can look back on with fondness.  I’ve since learned that after the event, after the caterers and band and florist and guests had gone, Mom was found (in the wee hours of the next morning) on her hands and knees cleaning the kitchen floors.  So, what did this teach me?  Two major things.

1. There is work to be done, so do it.  Mom didn’t have to be the one to coordinate and arrange everything, including picking a band, but she did.  Mom certainly didn’t need to be the one cleaning up the mess after the event, but she did.  Mom understood and still teaches us that there is work to be done and she does it.  Our reception was just one of the thousands of times that Mom has worked to get things done, not waiting for someone else to do it.  She does it, knowing that she will likely get very little thanks and certainly won’t get rewards or a “raise”.  This is how we should behave at work, regardless of our job title.  Work, simply because there is work to do
2. Do the dirty work and be grateful for it.  The image of Mom kneeling on the kitchen floor that night initially upset me.  WHY?  Why would a catering company leave a kitchen in such disarray?  Weren’t they paid to do a job?  Why didn’t they do it?  Well, Mom taught me that she was and is never above any job.  Be proud of any work and do it well. Mom works, regardless of the task, no matter how dirty.  So, be proud of what you do and enjoy it!  Work is a discipline that few will learn to appreciate and I am convinced that these are the people who figure out what happiness is about. If you met my Mom you'd know why I think hard workers are happy people.

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DuVall J Laws is the Director of Information Technology at Partners In Leadership. DuVall has managed in the Insurance, Banking, Healthcare and Leadership Training Industries.  DuVall holds a B.S. in Information Systems from Utah Valley University and an M.B.A from the University of Redlands.

 

What are we Building?

Dad's Dream House

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When I was in sixth grade and living in Mesa, Arizona, my folks decided to move the family to Blanding, Utah.  As part of the move, Dad decided he wanted to build his dream home.  He didn’t want to have someone else build it, he wanted to do the whole thing himself.  As a young man, he had spent many of his summers working various construction jobs and could do it all.  I guess he wanted see if he could pull it off. 

I recall that he started the project even before the official move happened.  He bought a piece of land that had belonged to his mother and got busy.  I travelled to Blanding a couple of times before the family arrived to help him over long weekends.  We did have basic power tools, but all the framing, plywood and sheet rock was nailed by hand.  At the time I was 11 years old, I was the oldest boy, but dad expected all of his kids to work hard.

Over the next several years, our family of 11 lived in a double wide trailer on the property while we built Dad’s Dream House.  Dad used his sons (and daughters) as much as their age would allow but the bulk of the help was provided by mom and the 4 oldest kids.  Nearly every day after school and most weekends; rain, snow or sweltering heat; up before the roosters or flood lights shining into the night; we worked on the house.  And worked on the house.  And worked on the house.  On rare occasions, I would ask dad if it was OK to spend Saturday with friends.  He usually allowed me to go but I felt guilty leaving, and my younger brothers weren’t too happy because they had to pick up my slack.

But we built THE. WHOLE. DANG. HOUSE!  We dug trenches, poured concrete, framed walls, laid joists, pulled wires, soldered pipes, nailed plywood, installed shingles, carried mortar, put up drywall, painted ceilings, put down carpet, hung doors, installed fixtures, glued up wallpaper and bandaided blisters.  Dad did, however, spend a few bucks to have someone install the insulation (thank the heavens).

In short, my brothers and I gave up most of our early teenage years to building Dad’s Dream House. Our friends all did teenage things and we were building the house.  They went to games and up to the mountain and we worked on the house.  They watched videos and ‘hung out’ while we built a house.  This bothered me at the time and to be transparent, it bugged me for many years thereafter.

Fast forward about 20 years and I was putting an addition on my own home.  I was patiently (yeah, right!) trying to teach my own two sons how to properly frame up a wall.  My friend had dropped by to say hello and when we took a break I said in exasperation, “It would be easier to just do it myself!” to which he replied, “yeah, but you’re trying to raise boys, not just walls”.  In a flash of memory and of pure clarity it dawned on me………………. that’s what my father had done for me and my brothers so many years ago.

For all those years I thought my father was using his boys to build his dream house.  Turns out, he was using his house to build his dream boys.

Now, my brothers and I are far from being ‘dream boys’ but that doesn’t diminish the herculean attempt by my father.  It’s amazing how time and perspective can change ones mind.  With the passage of time and the luxury of parenting experience, my annoyance (being bugged) has turned into intense gratitude.

Thanks dad, for ‘making’ us build your dream house.  

Since that time, many of my siblings and I, at one time or another, have earned our living in the construction trades (some longer than others). We have all used the skills learned by building Dad’s Dream House to construct, improve, remodel, rebuild, or enhance not only our own homes but scores of others.  And we have used those same skills to enhance, improve and strengthen our families and lives and businesses. 

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David J. Laws is an administrator and adjunct faculty in the Mechanical Engineering Department at Brigham Young University.  He has worked in the Automotive, Furniture and Medical Device Industries and holds 14 patents across all three fields.  Products he helped develop have sold in excess of $100 million worldwide.  David has both a B.S. and M.S. in Mechanical Engineering from BYU.

Prospering in the Workplace

Our Flocks & Fields

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Over a decade ago, while enrolled as a mechanical engineering student at Brigham Young University, I was very fortunate to get in on the ground level of a tremendous research project.  I was the assistant to a seasoned engineer.  He directly reported to the Engineering Vice President of the company.  We all worked closely together as a small team.

We enjoyed some early successes, and celebrated them often.  But I distinctly remember one trying length of time where, despite our best efforts, we could not overcome a particular problem.  Truth be told, I don't actually remember the exact issue, but I do remember something that happened as a result of our struggles.  I remember it as clear as day, and I have reflected on it many times throughout my career.

The Vice President of the company entered the research lab where I was working with my boss.  It was now just the three of us together.  In a humble tone, and a manor of mentorship,  the VP provided advice in a different way then he had ever done before.  He knew we all shared the same religious conviction, so he must have taken courage that his message would be well received.

He quietly reminded us of a scripture passage that encourages prayer over our flocks and our fields, that we may prosper in them.  The ancient audience of this particular message was likely farmers and shepherds, but the governing principle has little to do with crops or sheep.

The truth taught here … it is absolutely appropriate to pray over things we are involved in at work.  In fact, it is not only appropriate, it is very much encouraged in this passage.

So what did we do?  We verbally prayed together, right then and there.  In reverence we closed our eyes, we folded our arms, and we bowed our heads.  Three adults, in the middle of the day, in the middle of an engineering lab, in the middle of a professional struggle, prayed vocally.  We followed the advice of those few verses and prayed over our modern-day flocks and fields.

The project itself is not the emphasis here, so I'll skip to the end and tell you we overcame the challenge.  The award winning product we developed led (via an interesting detour) to a spin-off company that successfully manufactures and sells its product across the country.

I learned a couple valuable things from that one experience:

• These were the type of men I wanted to be associated with, professionally and personally.  All three of us have moved on to different companies since then, but I have kept in close contact with both.  The VP demonstrated great faith and courage that day.  I want to be like him.
• We all have flocks (employees) and fields (projects) at work.  If I want to prosper in them, then I need to pray over them continually.

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R. Dru Laws is Vice President of Seljan Company in Lake Mills Wisconsin, the Chair of the ARM (Association of Rotational Molding) Education Committee, a member of the ARM Board of Directors, and a global contributing editor to RotoWorld Magazine. Dru has a B.S. in Mechanical Engineering from Brigham Young University, and an MSc in Polymer Engineering from the Queens University of Belfast.